Keeping Your Groove While Quarantined With Kids

Hello Vibe Tribe! My name is Kimberly and I’m so excited to be here! I’m a writer, an artist, a mom, and a childhood friend of Stevi’s! She was even a bridesmaid in my wedding ;) I’m looking forward to being a part of this community - thanks for having me!

Over here in my world, we’re on day 165 of quarantine from COVID-19. 

ONE HUNDRED AND SIXTY-FIVE.

It feels like a long time because it IS a long time. While some aspects of sheltering in place have been exceptionally sweet, others have been a huge challenge. My partner and I have been lucky enough to be able to work from home and care for our five-year-old son. All the while, working to keep life as upbeat as possible while the world spins out of control. 

Our five-year-old is at such a fun age, and it’s been delightful for all of us to get so much extra time together. However. The child never naps, is awake for roughly 14 hours a day, and still semi-regularly wakes up in the middle of the night for long, involved conversations about his plans for the following day. 

All of this combined with juggling work, home life, and general crisis-exhaustion can add up to a serious dry spell in the bedroom. 

If you are one of those couples who is using this newfound free time to bang each other’s brains out day and night, I’m so happy for you and go with God. 

But if that is not your current situation, that’s ok too

There is no right or wrong way to process your emotions during a major crisis. How do you keep things sexy during a global pandemic? I literally have no idea. I’ve never done this before! But here are a few things that are helping me and my partner stay connected during this crazy time.

  1. Take Care of Your Own Mental Health

When your mental health is good, you are far more likely to pursue and really enjoy sexual intimacy. So do whatever you need to do to clear your mind and take care of that beautiful brain of yours. Make time to:

  • Exercise
  • Meditate
  • Breathe deeply
  • Seek solitude (even for just a few minutes)
  • Get enough sleep
  • Take part in hobbies that give you joy

Take care of yourself first, and everything else usually falls into place.

  1. Connect With Your Partner

When you’re stuck in the same house together 24/7 working, parenting, cooking, cleaning, and just generally trying to survive, making time for real connection can be tough. Now that we can’t get a sitter and go out on a date, we’ve been trying to create mini-date nights at home. Once the kid is asleep, we’ve been carving out evenings to sit in the backyard under the stars with a couple of cocktails together. More often than not, we find ourselves enjoying great conversation and laughter for hours and hours. It’s totally refreshing and necessary as two people who’ve chosen to spend our lives together. Remember, emotional connection = physical connection. 

  1. Realize That This Is Just A Season

This. Will. Pass. The stress. The anxiety. The uncertainty. The feeling of being “stuck.” It will ALL pass. Sooner or later, we will all be living in a new version of normal that doesn’t have the same urgency and panic that we feel today. If connecting sexually with your partner just isn’t happening as much as it used to right now, remember that this is just a season. The sexiness and sensuality and playfulness of your sex life WILL return. Keep nurturing your own mental and physical health and tending to your relationship with your partner, and trust that everything will fall into place again. Maybe a lot sooner than you think ;) 

XO

-Kimberly

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